What to Look for in a Retreat Facilitator

Written By Rebecca Jax

When you’re considering a healing retreat—whether in Bali or online—there’s one thing that can make or break your experience: the retreat facilitator.

Not the venue. Not the branding. The retreat facilitator is the one holding the energetic container for your experience. They’re the ones walking with you through your grief, your trauma, your breakthroughs and your soft landings.

So how do you know if someone’s the right facilitator for you? Let’s get into it.

Embodiment Over Performance

The first thing to feel into is embodiment.

Are they walking the talk? Or just performing the language of healing?

Embodiment means the facilitator isn’t just reciting spiritual concepts. They’ve lived through their own healing. They’ve sat with their shadows. They know what it means to cry through a breath session or be cracked open by grief and keep showing up—regulated, present, and humble.

You’ll know they’re embodied not because they say the “right” things—but because of how they make you feel. Safe. Seen. Unjudged.

At JAX, this is the backbone of every training we run. Our retreat facilitators don’t just learn how to guide. They learn how to hold. How to listen. How to become the energy they wish to transmit. Because healing isn’t taught in a textbook—it’s transmitted through nervous system safety.

Trauma-Informed Foundations

A trauma guide or facilitator understands the nervous system inside out. They know that a body in fight, flight, freeze, or fawn won’t open up just because you play soothing music or light a candle. They work with what’s real in the moment. They don’t push. They create space.

They also know how to recognise when someone’s gone beyond their window of tolerance—and how to gently guide them back. At JAX, our facilitators are trained to meet people where they are. This isn’t about intensity. It’s about safety.

When you’re looking for a facilitator, check if their training includes trauma-informed practices. Bonus points if they’ve done somatic training, nervous system education, or have clinical or peer-reviewed understanding of how trauma is stored in the body.

Our own facilitator training at JAX is an eight-month immersion in breathwork, energy healing, bodywork, and nervous system science. The final six days are taught in person, where students must demonstrate their ability to hold space, respond intuitively, and embody the principles we teach.

Certification vs. Lived Experience

You don’t need someone with a wall full of certificates. But you do want someone who is deeply trained, experienced, and lives their work.

At JAX, our experienced retreat facilitators are trained over months—not weekends. They’re not just learning a method. They’re undergoing their own process while learning how to guide others. This dual path is essential, because you can only hold someone as deeply as you’ve gone yourself.

When choosing a retreat, ask:

  • Has this person been trained in more than one modality?

  • Have they done their own inner work?

  • Do they have ongoing mentorship or supervision?

  • Do they offer integration support beyond the session?

A facilitator’s personal healing journey often adds just as much to their skillset as their formal education. It’s the depth of their own process that gives them the capacity to hold yours.

Nervous System Regulation

If someone can’t regulate themselves, they can’t regulate a room.

Retreat facilitators need to be grounded in the face of emotion, activation, and intensity. That doesn’t mean they don’t feel—it means they know how to come back to themselves quickly. This is where embodiment shows up again. If the room gets wobbly, your facilitator should feel like an anchor, not a mirror for your overwhelm.

All JAX facilitators are trained to recognise survival states—both in themselves and others. They know when to slow things down, when to support a discharge, and when to offer silence. They understand how to hold a group with coherence and clarity, even during deep emotional processes.

Attunement and Presence

A powerful facilitator knows how to read the room—not just with their eyes, but with their whole body. They’re attuned to subtle shifts. They notice if someone’s gone quiet or frozen. They sense when a group needs grounding or when someone is ready to go deeper.

Attunement is an energetic skill. It can’t be forced or faked. It comes from presence and deep listening.

At JAX, our facilitators train in attunement through practice, not performance. Every session is different. Every person is different. What works for one might not land for another. A good facilitator knows how to track the energy, not just follow a script.

Integrity and Humility

Facilitators aren’t here to heal you. They’re here to hold the space where healing can unfold.

The best retreat leaders have a healthy sense of self—not inflated, not collapsed. They’re not trying to be your saviour, your guru, or your therapist. They’re here to support your process, not centre their own.

At JAX, we take this seriously. We’ve built a community of grounded facilitators who lead with integrity. No pedestal. No hierarchy. Just real humans, doing real work.

Integration Support

Healing doesn’t end when the session does. A good facilitator will offer integration tools, check-ins, and support to help you land.

Our JAX retreats always include integration circles, optional check-ins post-retreat, and access to our online integration library. We also pair participants with experienced retreat facilitators who can help you process what’s come up, long after the retreat is over.

If a retreat offers no post-retreat support, think twice. You deserve to be held through the whole journey—not just the high points.

Ready to Find the Right Facilitator for You?

Whether you’re joining us at JAX in Bali or exploring a healing experience online, make sure the person holding space for you is doing their own work. Look for embodiment. Look for presence. Look for someone who isn’t just trained—but transformed.



Rebecca Jax
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Why Integration Spaces Matter at JAX Retreats